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Advice for Lovers: Breaking Up When Still In Love

By Heart Soaked for Boston Compass (#125)

July 30, 2020

Q: How to deal with a break up while still in love! Passion is there but logic tells me it’s not sustainable.

A: I think in the case of there not being an event to cause a stir leading to a break-up it is best to have the whole “I’m not sure this is going to turn into anything” talk. This conversation is so very necessary and might just be a vehicle for addressing each other’s wants and needs and possibly remedying the situation. Communicating intentions and reevaluating your plans together seems quite robotic and analytical but healthy and important. If you simply just don’t want to continue the relationship — I suggest a conscious uncoupling. Conscious uncoupling is a way of controlling a break-up together and making the separation less traumatic by addressing it as a positive completed relationship rather than a failed attempt at love. Each relationship teaches us lessons, and we have to look at those lessons as a gain! There is no use in wasting time especially time of someone you love or your own!

—xoxo Heart Soaked

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