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Advice for Lovers: Opening Up

By Daniela Thomas for Boston Compass (#129)

November 26, 2020

Q: How do I open up to a new person after getting cheated on?

A: TAKE. IT. SLOW. Building a foundation of trust is an ordinary task in a fresh relationship but can seem like a tall order for someone that has been deceived. The thing to keep in mind is exactly in your question: this is a “new person”. Everyone is different. Be transparent about your concerns and ask for reciprocal transparency. If there are moments where you feel a little uneasy and think there is something going on--open up about it and ask. If something they are doing is throwing up red flags, there should be air that allows the necessary dialogue to happen. If the person you are with is willing to work with you on that that is wonderful--but it’s not just something they have to work on--it involves you as well. What is love without risks? I would also go as far as suggesting you reach out to your ex (when the time is right) to create some closure for yourself.

— xoxo Heart Soaked


Check out all the art and columns of November's Boston Compass at


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